What’s next for you now your children have left for University?

After the long build-up of open days, making choices, the stress over exam results, and shopping for all the essentials they need for their next adventure, it seems as though the final steps to uni happen really quickly.

One minute you’re shopping for a tin opener, the next you’re waving goodbye to your  ‘baby’ as they begin their new adventure.

If this is your youngest or only child, your life is about to change in a big way too. So, what do you do now?

Be emotional

Firstly, give yourself permission to feel the entire range of emotions you’re probably feeling right now.  Sadness, joy, anxiety, pride, worry, excitement, and even grief.

Don’t let anyone tell you it’s not okay to feel any mixture of these emotions and more. 

Allow yourself time and space to process your feelings and slowly get used to the change.

Stay Connected from a distance

Find a healthy balance between being available for support while giving your son or daughter space to make new friends and build confidence in their new home.

So much happens at university during the first few weeks. They’ll be busy getting to know everyone and settling in. It might feel hard to let go, but your child is a young adult now, and needs space to grow confident without you.  Let them set the boundaries for your relationship now.

Put yourself first for a while

The past few weeks, or maybe months, have been all about University. It’s quite likely been all you’ve thought about and talked about. So now put the extra time and headspace to good use, and put yourself first for a while.

Do the things that bring you joy, whatever that might be. Go for walks, be creative, binge-watch your favourite shows, pamper yourself, or spend time with friends.

It’s time to reconnect with yourself.

Live for You

Once you become a parent, most of your decisions are based upon the needs of your family. Where you live, the type of car you drive, the hours you work, where and when you go on holiday.

Those needs change a lot over the years of course, but now you have a blank canvas where you can create life however you want to. It’s time for you to dream, imagine and live for you.

What would you do if you could do anything at all?

Dream and Plan

Think about all the things you have put off until the children were older. What stops you doing those things now?

If you have a partner, ask them too, what would they do if they could do anything?  Is it time to explore a different career, travel the world, move somewhere new? I love working on big dreams like this with clients, seeing the excitement in people’s faces as they talk about their ideas and imagine how life could be.

Of course, you don’t have to change anything. Maybe you’re really satisfied with life just the way it is. If you love your job, you’re happy in your relationship, and you already live in your dream home, then this is time for you to relax and enjoy life.

If you’re at a crossroads and still not sure what to do now your children have left, but know you want to do something different, then why not get in touch and see how I can help you find your path.

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